![]() “Who am I?” she would ask, and then she would turn to them and say, “I am whoever you want me to be.” You should know better, her alter-ego said, we’ve done this before.īut each time it was like every new person wiped the slate of her memory clean. ![]() It would last a few months, or it would go on for much too long, after the latch had broken. Platonic or romantic, it didn’t matter because whatever love she was feeling suddenly became the purest form. Someone who would become obsessed with her and she felt with her soul that the latch was the one. She would give them money that she didn’t have when they were down on her luck, but still, she found herself isolated and alone.Įvery so often she would find another latch. She took them to their appointments and took them out to eat. She planned parties and helped her friends move, even when she was sick. Then, she would end up on the cold tile of her bathroom floor, crying because he wasn’t very charming at all. Every man who showed the slightest interest would become her next prince charming. She droned on and on about this fairy tale love. They would have a dog and a cat and live happily ever after.īut she dismayed to find that happily ever after is just for fairytales. They would get married after a few years of living together, starting with a mattress on the floor and eventually, they would buy their own apartment. “Hello,” she said back to her dream, “what is your name?”įrom there, they would be inseparable. ![]() ![]() A nice boy would catch her eye in class, he would walk over to her, and he would say “hello.” She was late to the dating game, but when she arrived, she was expecting the romance and chivalry of her grandparents. She wasn’t like this until she got involved with men. You deserve it, you know, her alter-ego would snide, making a face of disgust and she knew that she did deserve it. For years she flipped between identities- a stick floating in an ocean of ideologies- but each time she began to felt happiness, something would come and hit her like she was a deer on a country road, and she was left sitting in the dark. Floating between something and nothing was a dangerous game, but it was her favorite game.
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